August 30, 2009

The start of school is only a week away, how better to celebrate that then with a Back-to-school book reading by the local author Jacqui Robbins.

Jacqui will read from her new Back-to-School picture book Two Of A Kind at this AADL special event for youth (preschool to grade three) at the Ann Arbor District Library Pittsfield Branch on Thursday, September 3 from 7:00 to 8:00 pm. The event will include a special kids hands-on activity as well as a book signing with the author (books will also be on sale at the event).

What a great way to start your child off for a brand-new school year!!!

August 27, 2009

Free Alert - The Milk Mustache Mobile Tour in Ann Arbor

The Milk Mustache Mobile Tour is dropping into Ann Arbor this Saturday August 29, at the Busch’s on Main Street. From 5-7pm, this family-focused event will provide free smoothies and milk samples, as well as massage and health assessment on-site. Stop in too, to have your family pose for their very own "Milk Mustache" photo - Just like in the celebrity advertisements for milk!

This year’s theme is Drink Well. Live Well. As milk is being reintroducing as Nature’s Wellness Drink. Focusing on the wellness benefits of milk, the event will have a Wellness Beverage Center where people can sample milk from Prairie Farms Dairy, Inc. as well as lowfat smoothies.

As a courtesy of my readers, the mobile tour is giving me some fun Got Milk? gear to give away to my readers. I will randomly draw winners from the first five area-moms that e-mail me the answer to the following question before Saturday:

Q: How many fewer calories can you expect to consume at lunch if you drink a glass of fat free milk at breakfast time?

A: The answer can be found at www.whymilk.com!

Check back the AnnArborMom site after the event - I'll plan on being at the tour to capture some of the Ann Arbor families who are having fun at the event!

Creative Commons License / photo credits: Got Milk? campaign

August 26, 2009

Sometimes life gives you gumballs - Dealing with a lying toddler

My daughter has been going through quite the lying jag these past six-or-so-months. She is so good (and creative) with what she comes up with it amazes me. Not to mention she has the prettiest sky-blue angel eyes that look at you with adoration in her dead-pan delivery of her lies! She’ll either be an awesome poker player or one heck of an actress when she grows up.

I know that most kids go through this lying stage. My son went through the phase without telling any real whoppers - That is not to say he is cured at age five of lying, however he now understands the consequences of doing so. My daughter on the other hand still doesn’t “get it” but she’s still young. A perfect example of one of her “whoppers” was this:

We started potty training at two-and-a-half with her, as she exhibited all the signs and WANTED to wear big-girl pants. After she turned three this past winter though, we began having issues with her wetting her pants before getting to the bathroom. This was presumably because she was too busy playing to take a break. I used all the tricks to get her to use the restroom with any frequency - everything from physically placing her on the toilet, to setting a timer, to a rewards system. She would still wet her pants just a little - She'd say "I leaked". One particular day, I saw the wetness on the back of her pants and said to her:

“Gabby did you pee your pants?”

Without missing a beat she looked me straight in the eye and with a smile said, “No, Bailey licked my butt.”

Frankly I didn’t know if I should applaud her creativity, laugh at how funny the scenario or sternly admonish her - I simply WASN’T expecting that response! Bailey is our DOG!!!
I suppose age and experience have taught me to think out of the box though to get the answers I need. Actually it was probably one of the sales training sessions I sat through at one time or another. I remember one particular lesson: Don’t ask a yes or no question of someone, or you will only get a yes or no answer. I.e. A fast-food worker should never ask “Do you want fries with that?” but instead should ask “What size fries would you like with that?” I’m not sure why I remembered this particular technique in working through “getting a toddler not to lie” but somewhere along the line it came to top of mind…


The point is, as a parent of creative children (or any child really) I need remember to ask the right questions to get the answers I want. I don’t always think to do this immediately, but do tend to remember when I am getting nowhere with my questions.

One day, when my son was not quite three years old, I arrived at daycare to a not-so-smiling care worker.


“What happened?” I asked, and was told my son had used a Sharpie marker on the face of another child. OUCH! (Don’t ask why a Sharpie was within reach of my child, I am not certain of that myself.) I asked several times why he had done that, without getting an answer.
Later I tried again, this time asking, “Zach what did you draw on that child’s face?”


“Mommy I was only face-painting for her.”


(As coincidence would have it, I HAD myself, volunteered to face paint the weekend before. He was in attendance and thought the “markers” I used looked like the Sharpie I guess.)


At least I got an answer I could reason with ; We also had a long discussion on what face painting was, and that there were special face-painting pens that mommy used. He never face-painted another child at least, so I THINK he got it!


The other day I had another opportunity to sharpen my skills. My daughter was playing with gumballs from my son’s gumball machine, when out of the corner of my eye I saw her give one to Bailey. Yes, that's Bailey the dog!


Jumping up I said, “Gabby did you just feed Bailey a gumball?”


“No.”

Taking a deep breath, I dug deeper trying again, “Gabby, what color was the gumball you fed to Bailey?”

Leaning in closely so that I could hear her she whispered, “It was white!”

August 22, 2009

Just Released: Ann Arbor Parks & Rec Fall/Winter Recreation Guide

Everything you wanted to know about events and activities with Ann Arbor Parks & Recreation - Heads up townies Ann Arbor Parks & Recreation just posted their Fall/Winter Recreation Guide online! Everything from skating to swimming, classes for kids to seniors and more. Registration for all classes begins Monday August 24.

For anyone wanting even faster AAP&R, you can follow them on twitter: www.twitter.com/a2parks.


Creative Commons License / photo credits: Ann Arbor Parks & Recreation

August 21, 2009

The Watermelon Lesson

Our garden this summer has yielded many wonderful fruits and vegetables for the family. The kids revel in cooking with and sharing our bounty. We’ve made our own maple Syrup from tapping local Ann Arbor Maple trees, many types of wild black and red raspberry preserves from forraging expeditions, and we have made Mulberry goodies, Blackberry snacks and have eaten plenty of fresh garden veggies - assorted greens, radishes, carrots, potatoes, peas, asparagus, a variety of squash, cucumbers and more. The prize of the garden this year though seems to be the watermelon and the two varieties of pumpkins the kids planted. Surprisingly enough those plants have done really well and in fact flourished! My son has been dying to pick them too.

I have explained several times about how to tell when watermelons specifically, are ripe. I’ve also talked about the pumpkins being ripe after he began school - He just can’t get it out of his head though that the watermelons and pumpkins aren’t yet ripe.

When we went out to the garden the other night to harvest beans, toms and green peppers, raced over to check out their watermelon and pumpkin plants, and like little drummers immediately began thumping the fruits!

“Mom I think it’s ready, it sounds like a drum!”

“No baby it’s not ready yet, maybe another week.”

“But mom, it’s color is changing some underneath.”

“Not enough Zach.”

“But MOM it sounds like a drum!”

So I finally gave up and wander across the garden rows to take a look. Zach’s right, many of his observations seem accurate. Even the little leaves near the stem are beginning to fade some and it does appear to have a different sound when thumped. It still doesn’t appear to be fully ripe though! After an intense 20-minute debate with him though, I finally caved in - I figured the worst that could happen was that it wasn’t ripe (My husband reminded me that the worst would be rot or bugs, but we won’t go there.).

When we arrived at home, Zach rushed to the silverware drawer and immediately wanted to slice into the melon - Fine. Sure enough it wasn’t fully ripe, in fact, like a flower just coming into bloom, the insides of the melon we just beginning to hint at the pink juiciness to come. We each got a few bites of sugary goodness, but not nearly as much as if the ice-box melon were truly ripe.

The best part about this entire experience though was the ensuing lesson learned. As Zach took the last sweet bite he grumbled, “Darn, why didn’t I listen to you!” You see the sweetest satisfaction I got that day was in knowing that sometimes you let your children make mistakes and then learn from them.

A ripe melon would have hit the spot that sweltering August day, however life-lessons which are best taught by example are sometimes even better.

August 19, 2009

Wastenaw Couty Parks and Rec Upcoming Events

I mentioned in a post last week on AnnArbor.com what a great resource we have right here in Ann Arbor for fun, free family events. As coincidence would have it, the next day I received the electronic version of the latest Washtenaw County Parks & Recreation book (Fall 2009). As expected there are many events that are repeats of past successful events as well as several new events. In today's article I will highlight two of them that I have enjoyed with my family!

MayrendGabbyMarshmallows.jpgFAMILY CAMP OUT!
Saturday September 12
Independence Lake
5:00 pm until 11:00 am Sunday morning!

This is a great, inexpensive, local camping excursion for the family. We went last year because the kids wanted to camp, and I wasn't sure I was up to camping with a pre-schooler and toddler. In the end though, even with the overnight rain and the restrooms a good distance away, it was an awesome experience!

We started the night with a slide-show by Faye Stoner - She talked all about the animals in the woods then took us on a night-time nature hike. We even had several owls calling back to us when we tried calling them! After that there was a HUGE campfire with fireflies circling, bats in the night sky and plenty of stars to be seen. Breakfast was provided the next morning too!

There were probably 20 families in attendance that day, and it was evident MANY of them have camped for several years with this program - Many groups had their own little "huddle" of tents which only heightened the experience. The best part was, the cost of camping was VERY reasonably priced - I think it only cost us $10 once we got there!

IF you would like to attend the Family Camp Out, please sign up EARLY by contacting Faye at 834-971-6337 x334.

MayrendCider.jpgMAKE YOUR OWN CIDER!
October 17 & 18
10:00 am - 5:00 pm
Parker Mill

I LOVE real apple cider - And I do mean unpasteurized, fresh, crisp cool cider - There is NOTHING like it! I was excited to learn that in Ann Arbor, families have several opportunities to press their own cider and learn about the process - We made ours at Parker Mill.

The first year, we couldn't get in, since the event was filled. In 2007 though we attended with our two little ones, and were basically laughed at because the kids are all but useless. Let me tell you, pressing cider, and the entire process is HARD work. I would encourage families to bring the family muscles. We pressed cider again last year with a little more strength - At least the kids could help load the grinder and also turn the press a bit.

This is another great family event in Ann Arbor that is free, but SIGN up early if you want to attend (734) 971-6337 X334 - They fill spaces VERY quickly. We'll be pressing our own cider again this year, and I have volunteered to help since I can knowledgeably help Faye out! If you can't get into WCP&R Cider Day, Apple Day at the Grange is September 26 as well (734) 769-1052.

There are many other events that Washtenaw County Parks & recreation is offering in their Fall 2009 schedule. I will likely be writing on several of them! Remember though, now is NOT too late to sign up!

photos by Tammy Mayrend
photo 1: Gabriella Mayrend at the Family Camp Out! (2008)
photo 2: Michael, Gabriella & Zachary Mayrend at the Make Your Own Cider event in 2008

August 18, 2009

Tree Town Toys Crafty Wednesday

I've been searching around town this week for fun events - That is especially since it is supposed to rain on and off much of the week. beyond story times, I haven't seen a lot during the week. THAT'S when I remembered that Tree Town Toys has a scheduled low-cost craft project every week.MayrendZachnPuppet.jpg

Stop by Tree Town Toys this Wednesday at 2:00 pm to have your child, age 3 and up, create their very own fuzzy, "no-mess" sock puppet! (Hey it's already "No mess" considering it's not done in MY home!)

Create-Your-Own Sock Puppets
When: Wednesday August 19, 2:00 - 4:00 pm
Where: Tree Town Toys - 2611 Plymouth Rd AA 48105
(734) 929-6545
Cost: $4.00

Project Description: Transform super-soft socks into fuzzy puppet friends. This "no-mess" project features peel and stick felt shapes, self-adhesive wiggly eyes and fuzzy fun embellishments. This is a great activity to foster language development and spontaneous creative play for any child - just add a little imagination and let the show begin!


photo by Tammy Mayrend / photo: Zachary Mayrend and his sock puppet

August 15, 2009

Ypsilanti Heritage Festival

When we moved to the area four years ago, my brother told me "Don't forget to go the the Ypsilanti Heritage Festival." I thought, "Great a small town festival, in Ypsilanti of all places - How fun can THAT be?" But we attended the festival anyway, with our then 1 1/2 year old son. It was actually pretty enjoyable.

The re-enactors were very helpful, we learned a little about the area that we hadn't known and we enjoyed our new neighbors as we had fun eating festival food and soaking up the atmosphere. In the past several years i think the festival has even gotten bigger and better. last year when we attended the Buffalo Soldiers even had free rides on their horses (I use the term free but they were looking for donations, which we happily gave).

The festival runs August 21-23, with a parade at 10:00 am on August 22. The festival includes living history, plenty of children's activities, crafts, food and so much more. So come and enjoy the festivities, it's fun for the entire family!!!

Ypsilanti Heritage Festival 2009
August 21-23
Friday noon - 9
Saturday 10 - 9
Sunday 11 - 7

August 13, 2009

Sometimes life gives you gumballs - Dealing with a lying toddler


MayrendGumballs.jpgMy daughter has been going through quite the lying jag these past six-or-so-months. She is so good (and creative) with what she comes up with it amazes me. Not to mention she has the prettiest sky-blue angel eyes that look at you with adoration in her dead-pan delivery of her lies! She’ll either be an awesome poker player or one heck of an actress when she grows up.

I know that most kids go through this lying stage. My son went through the phase without telling any real whoppers - That is not to say he is cured at age five of lying, however he now understands the consequences of doing so. My daughter on the other hand still doesn’t “get it” but she’s still young. A perfect example of one of her “whoppers” was this:

We started potty training at two-and-a-half with her, as she exhibited all the signs and WANTED to wear big-girl pants. After she turned three this past winter though, we began having issues with her wetting her pants before getting to the bathroom. This was presumably because she was too busy playing to take a break. I used all the tricks to get her to use the restroom with any frequency - everything from physically placing her on the toilet, to setting a timer, to a rewards system. She would still wet her pants just a little - She'd say "I leaked". One particular day, I saw the wetness on the back of her pants and said to her:

Mayrenddaughterndog.JPG
Gabby did you pee your pants?

Without missing a beat she looked me straight in the eye and with a smile said, “No, Bailey licked my butt.

Frankly I didn’t know if I should applaud her creativity, laugh at how funny the scenario or sternly admonish her - I simply WASN’T expecting that response! Bailey is our DOG!!!

I suppose age and experience have taught me to think out of the box though to get the answers I need. Actually it was probably one of the sales training sessions I sat through at one time or another. I remember one particular lesson: Don’t ask a yes or no question of someone, or you will only get a yes or no answer. I.e. A fast-food worker should never ask “Do you want fries with that?” but instead should ask “What size fries would you like with that?” I’m not sure why I remembered this particular technique in working through “getting a toddler not to lie” but somewhere along the line it came to top of mind…

The point is, as a parent of creative children (or any child really) I need remember to ask the right questions to get the answers I want. I don’t always think to do this immediately, but do tend to remember when I am getting nowhere with my questions.

One day, when my son was not quite three years old, I arrived at daycare to a not-so-smiling care worker.

What happened?” I asked, and was told my son had used a Sharpie marker on the face of another child. OUCH! (Don’t ask why a Sharpie was within reach of my child, I am not certain of that myself.) I asked several times why he had done that, without getting an answer.

Later I tried again, this time asking, “Zach what did you draw on that child’s face?

Mommy I was only face-painting for her.

(As coincidence would have it, I HAD myself, volunteered to face paint the weekend before. He was in attendance and thought the “markers” I used looked like the Sharpie I guess.)

At least I got an answer I could reason with ; We also had a long discussion on what face painting was, and that there were special face-painting pens that mommy used. He never face-painted another child at least, so I THINK he got it!

The other day I had another opportunity to sharpen my skills. My daughter was playing with gumballs from my son’s gumball machine, when out of the corner of my eye I saw her give one to Bailey. Yes, that's Bailey the dog!

Jumping up I said, “Gabby did you just feed Bailey a gumball?

No.

Taking a deep breath, I dug deeper trying again, “Gabby, what color was the gumball you feed to Bailey?

Leaning in closely so that I could hear her she whispered, “It was white!

August 12, 2009

Free Teen Event Alert!

A new event for this week was brought to my attention:

NOISE PERMIT - Back To School Block Party!
Sponsored by TCW2, WATT, Community Records Foundation & Ozone House
When: August 14, 2009
3:00 PM - 9:00 PM
Where: Frog Island Park, Ypsilanti

This year the event will be better and longer with more bands to attract more youth - The groups are hoping to attract 500 teens to attend the event, so help them out! There will be FREE food and FREE entertainment by youth performers ranging from rap groups and slam poetry to rock bands.

If you are a youth artist or a youth serving organization, please call 734-973-4384 or e-mail info@tcw2.cous for information on how to receive a free table at the event!

FREE ALERT!

This is for all you parents out there looking for free, educational outings for your family. (This one is specifically geared for children through age seven!)

August 26-28, families have the opportunity to attend a FREE Kindermusik session in Ann Arbor - To sign up for a free class, make sure to visit Linda Anderson's Kindermusik website.

I loved introducing my children to Kindermusik, in fact, they both began classes in the first month of their lives! Introducing young children to music can build a foundation for learning and lifelong love for music. I firmly believe that exposing Zach and Gabby to Kindermusic, it helped to:

Develop early language skills
Acquire early reasoning skills
Learn early math shills
Increase self-control

If you have any thoughts of taking a class but are nervous about what you'll find once you are there, I found this great video clip. Please don't be ashamed of your voice, believe me all eyes are on the children - Of course if you CAN sing, the teacher would LOVE to have you!!! This video specifically previews "Family Time" which is geared for entire families - We took this class for most of Gabby's life since taking two separate classes became challenging to schedule!


If you have ANY questions about Kindermusik, and how it helped my children, I'd be glad to answer your questions!

Enjoy the day at Dexter Daze - this weekend!

I love to wander the many of the local Ann Arbor area festivals and events - This weekend you can expect to see us wandering the streets of Dexter as the Dexter Chamber of Commerce hosts the 37th Annual Dexter Daze DowntownDexter_Mi.JPGcommunity fair. As with most local fairs, there will 100's of local artists, food, and plenty of family-entertainment and fun for all! Don't forget to enjoy the community parade on Saturday at 10:00 AM too!!!

Dexter Days Community Fair
9:00 AM - 11:00 PM Friday August 14
8:00 AM - 11:00 PM Saturday August 15

Dexter's annual summer festival is held each year in the beginning of August showcases our community. Artisans display their arts and crafts in Monument Park while free entertainment is enjoyed by all ages in this two-day event which draws over 30,000 people to the downtown area. The festival has also become an important function for the community and local service clubs, as it allows them to raise funds to finance projects that benefit the area.

Take the 20 minute drive from Ann Arbor to visit the quaint village of Dexter. The weather forcast is looking to be a picture-perfect August day, with sunny skies and temps in the mid-80's - What a great way to spend an end of the summer weekend!


Creative Commons License
/ photo credits: The Village of Dexter

August 11, 2009

Climb on up with the AADL and Planet Rock!

MayrendRockWallClimb.JPGLet me tell you, rock climbing LOOKS like a walk in the park, I'm wondering though if inactivity since college and age have gotten the best of me, because on a recent trip north I tried climbing a rock wall again... I made the mistake of not going fast enough though, and thinking too much about which "rock-hold" to grab - In other words I didn’t have the best form, and my muscled began protesting.

Much to the delight of my children though, I DID make it up the wall to ring the bell, but was EXHAUSTED by the time I repelled to the ground - WHAT a trip! My husband was successful with scaling the wall too, so it was doubly exciting for the kids!

Neither Zach nor Gabby would try to climb the wall though - I guess I should have expected that for a 3 & 5-year-old, but they would have been strapped into a harness and helped along had they wished to try it out!

If your 6 to 12 grade student is lamenting that there is nothing to do, and they might like to TRY rock climbing, they will have the opportunity to do so this Friday - For FREE!

On Friday August 14 from noon - 3:30 PM, The Ann Arbor District Library is hosting "Climbing 101" at Planet Rock. Stop by and try your luck with indoor rock climbing and enjoy the fun - It's GREAT exercise too!

Climbing 101
When: Noon-3:30 p.m.
Where: Planet Rock, 82 Aprill Dr.
off eastbound Jackson Rd. between Parkland Pl. and Jackson Pl.
Ages: Grades 6-12 (with signed parental waiver)
Cost: Free
Call 734-327-4200 for more information

For more family-friendly events be sure to check out the parenting section of AnnArbor.com I frequently add unique content to both sites!

photo: Michael Mayrend climbing the rock wall at Crystal Mountain, MI 2009

August 5, 2009

Building memories to last a lifetime

MayrendGreenGlassBambi.jpgA small hand-blown green glass animal, Tabu perfume, and bendy straws: What do these things have in common? They are all a part of who I am, each holding a significance in my life, each item a memento, a precious memory.

I try to expose my children to so many experiences in life - a quiet walk in the woods spotting birds, feeding the ducks in the pond out back, planting a garden, eating at nice restaurants, participating in special mother/son and mother/daughter time, sports, movies and so much more.

I feel that by enriching their minds with new experiences, memories can be shared. Memories can be built. I wonder though, "Will my children remember?" And "What events will they reflect upon with a special fondness?"

My husband often says that I try too hard to build these moments - It's as if I am trying to shape their experiences much like a photographer sets the stage for his still life study. Items are painstakingly arranged, lights perfectly aligned, shadows cast in just the right direction so that the viewer knows exactly what the photographer was going for with the final image. But life doesn't hold still. No matter what I say or do, my children will not always remember things I want, the way I want them to - I suppose this is what makes things so right.

The funny thing about new experiences is that we each remember the things we do by the color of the glasses we wear. I know this sounds like a cliché, but it's painfully true. What I remember differs from what my brother remembers, even if the events are the same. How I see things after hearing the story for the millionth time is different.

While cleaning out my jewelry box the other day, I unwrapped a small bundle of tissue. In it, gently wrapped, was the tiny green glass Bambi mom brought home from Williamsburg for me when I was a kid. To this day I cannot believe that it has gotten through my life unbroken! (Although since the kids were born it HAS been tucked into a small box gently wrapped in the aforementioned tissue!) Bambi sat on my dresser year after year as I turned from a girl into a young woman.

When I moved to my first post-college apartment, Mom lost the fragile animal somewhere en route. (It was found months later located under the seat in mom's car!) At the time, I was devastated. Mom couldn't understand why I had gotten so upset, until I told her WHERE Bambi had come from. She thought it some silly childhood trinket I should have disposed of; instead I suppose every time I glance at it, it's a reminder of happier, more simple childhood joys.

The smell of Tabu perfume stops me dead in my tracks. My grandma Cray had a poodle grooming business. She sprayed all of her "customers" with Tabu. To this day, if I catch a whiff of that perfume it's as if I am suddenly an awkward adolescent playing in her pink poodle grooming room, clipping pretty ribbons from spools. My brother only remembers me locking him into the dog cages or otherwise getting into trouble.

A few nights ago, I pulled out two straws for the kids' smoothies, only instead of being the typical straight straws, I apparently had a few bendy straws in the box. You know, the straws with the accordion goose-neck style bend? Bendy straws are an iconic remembrance of a good friend's mother who recently passed away. As I pulled the two straws from the box I instantly thought of Judy - the way she would hold her soda can, the way she could never open the tops of cans, and the way she would sip her soda with a bendy-straw poking out an an awkward angle but tipped just right as not to drip!

MayrendPebbles.jpgSo today, as my children and I played along the banks of Lake Huron, while standing in the shadows of the Blue Water Bridge, across from the home that as a baby I was brought home to, I wonder: "Will my children have fond memories of some silly rock they picked up, a treasure they gently tucked into their little fists and kept from today?"

I don't know what the future holds for my children; however, I know there are apt to be memories I cannot fathom, stories I don't remember and experiences I hope they'll never forget. I can't wait to take this awesome trip with them and watch, every day, as the wonder and amazement of something new crosses their faces, and lives.

"Memory is a child walking along a seashore.
You never can tell what small pebble it will pick up
and store away among its treasured things."
~Pierce Harris, Atlanta Journal

August 1, 2009

The first cow - Explanations of where babies come from

MayrendBabyCow.jpgMy son has been very interested in asking questions of late. I suppose that’s not so bad since he is five; however it is the nature of the questions that is of a little concern to me. His most common questions revolve around babies and specifically “Mom where do babies come from?

I know its normal behavior, and I don’t have difficulties answering most questions - but he is 5 - FIVE! He doesn’t even begin school for a few weeks, so where are these questions coming from? Is it normal for five-year-olds to NEED to know this info? It feels a little too early to answer this question with any substance. Luckily, as coincidence would have it, he seems satisfied with the vaguest of answers.

My M.O. has been to ask him “Well what do you think?” or simply say “Babies come from their mommy’s tummies.”

The other day though, as we were driving down I-94, he asked me again, “Mom where do babies come from?” “Well where do you think they come from?” “I know it takes a mommy and a daddy and the doctor cut me out of your tummy.” (C-section for both kids wouldn’t you know…) “Yes honey that’s right. Did you get the answer you needed?” “Yes.” As I breathe a HUGE sigh of relief...

There is silence in the car, until we pass a large truck hauling cattle. “Mom where are they taking the cows?”

I have to stop at this, because again, how much information is TOO much information for a five-year-olds brain. “Well Zach, sometimes cows become food for us. You know that, right?”

“Yes.”

“That is where we get steak and hamburgers.”

“So someone is gonna cut them up? Won’t that hurt?”

Again I have to dig deep for the answers, thinking quickly for something that makes sense - Got it. “Well sweetie, the cows are asleep and they don’t feel it.”

“Mom, did it hurt when I came out of your tummy?”

Damned my answers came back to haunt me - He’s back to asking about babies due to my C-sections. “No sweetie, I wanted you and your sister so badly it didn’t hurt me.”

Now comes the rapid fire, on the chopping block questions...

“So where do baby cows come from?”

“They come out of their mommy’s tummies.”

“So they are like us?”

“Yes sweetie, they are called mammals - They come out of their mommy’s tummy and drink her milk so they can grow.”

“But where do they COME from?”

I’m now getting frustrated and I sense his frustrations as well as I ask, “WHERE do you think they came from?”

“No, MOM, I mean the FIRST cow. Where did IT come from”

Now this stops me. To avoid any explanation of Creationism vs. Evolution to a five-year-old though, I opted for the easiest answer for my son to grasp - I suppose one might argue that I saw my out…”Well sweetie, God created the first cow.”

There is now silence in the car, complete, blessed SILENCE. He seemed to accept that answer - Thankfully he hasn’t asked about the first human, or asked again about babies and their "specifics", but I have a sinking suspicion that I am going to need simplified answers sooner rather than later…

But, he’s only FIVE!!! Isn’t that a bit early to want to know about the human reproductive cycle?!


Creative Commons License / photo credit: colostate